Thank You Letter to the Donor Family

Dear Donor Family,

Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Our seventeen year old son is a high school senior and third year starter on the varsity football team. He is a running back and had already accumulated over 450 rushing yards when forces combined to put an end to his football career and future dreams, of playing college ball and becoming a surgeon, on game six of a ten game season. While protecting the ball, he was tackled high and both he and the 200+ pound opposing player came down on our son’s right shoulder resulting in a class five separation. There are only six classes of separation and anything over a three is operable. The trainer said that was it. No one can play with that kind of pain…or should.

In an unusual twist, when the shoulder separated, it made a button-hole tear through the trapezius muscle instead of tearing it away from the bone. This allowed the collar bone to slide back into place even though it was now free-floating. The team doctor happened to be a shoulder reconstruction specialist who said our son could continue to play, not expecting him to do so since the pain would be too severe with every hit and tackle that he took. Believing his future football career to be over, he wanted to try and play those last games. The trainer ordered some magic tape and bound the shoulder; we added a compression shirt with extra padding and held our breath as we allowed him back on to the field.

Our son amazingly finished the season, coming in 7th in the division in rushing and 18th overall in the conference, and achieving 2nd Team All-Conference. The team doctor, after watching him play, said he’s never in his entire medical career seen an athlete continue with the kind of injury our son had, not college players, not even professional hockey players.

The one month delay between the initial injury and the end of the season meant our son’s own ligaments were no longer repairable. The common procedure for this kind of surgery is to harvest tissue from the patient’s own hamstring. This wasn’t really an option either because as a running back, his legs are his bread-and-butter. Your tissue donation made it possible for our son to have his shoulder beautifully reconstructed two weeks ago. He’s doing everything the doctor instructed and is healing nicely. Thanks to good test scores and grades, he’s currently in talks with nineteen schools about playing college ball, the dream he thought was gone six weeks ago. Included in those schools are several top tier schools like Princeton, Cornell, University of Chicago, Bucknell, and Case Western. Being able to play football may be the thing that sets him apart from other applicants and secures him an admissions spot. Your donation has given him back his dreams. Thank you just doesn’t seem to be enough.

Surgery Day

Kirk is home and resting comfortably. They did some really cool things with his pain meds that will help him get up on his feet faster and be more comfortable. Right now he has a personal ice machine pump and chocolate protein smoothy while watching Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull on DVD so he's as good as can be expected. He's texting just fine with his left hand.

I have to run down to Goodwill now and pick up some old sweatshirts and t-shirts that we can cut up since he can't put that arm through anything. He'll have about a four-inch scar and since it runs vertically, the doc joked that he'll still be able to model bras with straps. Kirk had the best line of the day...when they shaved his arm pit he asked if they would donate it to Locks of Love. He has a big ol' pillow (larger than a football) that sits under his forearm, keeping the shoulder in the best position. He has to tote it around for a month. I think it needs a name. Any suggestions?

He had it repaired with donor tissue. They asked us to write a letter to the donor family. I guess up until I read the request it was "cadaver" tissue to me, like Dawn of the Dead, not a real person. Obviously it is a real person, but I didn't mentally go there until I was asked. It's certanly something I never thought I'd do. I think it's kinda cool. Return to Me is one of my very favorite movies! If you were receiving such a letter, what details would you want to know???

Good News

We finally heard back on Jake's blood tests. Everything is normal. No celiac disease. Now we have to decide if we're going to pursue what is causing the inflamation of the tissues in his duodedum or let it "simmer" the way we are with his throat right now. I'll consult with the GI again next week.

Kirk's surgery is scheduled for Thursday, November 6th.

Trunk-or-Treat

Tonight was our ward Halloween Party. There was a chili cookoff, homemade cornbread and apple pie. So yummy! There were carnival games for the kids, but Jake was most proud of being the first one through the gauntlet of cars for the Trunk-or-Treat. We decorated our car like a giant monster mouth. That's what it always looks like to me when I open the back hatch to put groceries in the car. Easy AND cheap with lots of impact. My kinda project! We had a really good time visiting with friends in the ward and playing with our Primary class.

Battle of the Bell

Tonight was the last game of Kirk's high school football career. It was against Milford for the Battle of the Bell. The bell goes to the winning team each year and this year it went to us! That puts the season at 6-4, winning all home games. I only cried three times.

It rained all day and ruined the tailgate. It stopped and we started the introduction of the seniors and their parents, but it started up again and we had to wait for a lightning delay. They read Kirk's bio from the press box while Brian and I escorted him to center field. That was the first time I cried.

Melissa Lipovich drove down from Dublin to see the game and sat with me. I don't know what I would have done without her. She was so helpful with Jake and helped me keep my emotions glued together. It was SO COLD! We shivered together and watched Kirk begin to have a great game.

He scored the first touchdown of the game and took several really hard hits. Somewhere in the second quarter, he had to come out. I talked to the trainer at the half who said she was going to pace Kirk the rest of the game so that he could finish. With two minutes left on the clock we lost possession of the ball and the defence went in. I realized that might be it, the end. Kirk might not go in again. That was the second time I cried. They did get the ball back and with seconds left on the clock were able to end the game with a victory formation.


The hardest moment came after the bell was rung by each senior and the coaches had said their words of wisdom. As a group, the seniors slid through the mud, becoming "one with the field."

Then they ran together to the end zone, laid on their stomachs and kissed the grass before lining up in a row on the very edge of the field. As a group they took a giant step onto the track, their cleats making a scratching sound against the hard rubber, symbolically saying goodbye to the field and to high school football. They came, they played hard, and they were done. Most of them forever since they won't go on to play college ball. That's when I really lost it. Kirk was flying so high he even hugged me when he came out of the locker room with a smile on his face.

Now I get to wash that uniform...ew. I'll probably lose it again.

Good News, No News, and Bad News

The good news is that Jake's heart is fine. Last month at his annual physical, Jake's doctor heard something he didn't like and referred us to cardiology with the assurance that it was nothing to worry about. Ordinarily one might worry, but in our family, "nothing is anything until it's something." We don't borrow stress. We have enough real stress.

It was inconvenient when the anesthesiologist demanded an EKG before Jake's scope on the 25th, but we jumped through hoops and so did the nurses at Children's to get it done. The scope proceeded and Jake had his first visually clear scope in two years.

The pathology came back last Friday and the doctor said there were still eosinophils simmering in his tissues. Not enough, however, to change any of his meds or foods or routines. There was something else cooking though. Non-eos specific flaring in the duodenum.

Yesterday we went in for the cardiology work up and had blood drawn at the same time. The cardiologist confirmed Jake had a "fourth heart sound" but that it was nothing to worry about. The blood draw will to confirm or rule-out celiac disease. Those results will take a week to come back. I'm inclined to think it will rule-out celiac because Jake's never had symptoms or been asked to have these tests before. But nothing is anything until it's something. Until then, it's no news.

The bad news is that Kirk's shoulder has continued to slip in and out of position which means he will need surgery to stablize the bone. Because it does go back, Kirk's surgeon has agreed to let him play as long as he can endure the pain. Frankly, the doctor is shocked that he hasn't pulled himself out and demanded the surgery. He has to be in terrible pain. Yesterday at practice he "whited" out. He took a hard hit in just the right place to cause pain so great that everything "went white" stealing his vision and other senses. It wasn't like losing consciousness which would be a "black out." There are three more games left. I'm waiting for the nurse to call back with a surgery date. The doctor tells us it will be six months of recovery. That should still put Kirk in shape in time for college ball to start. We hope to have his senior highlight reel done by the end of the week.

It's a Miracle...

Kirk had additional x-rays and a CAT scan done today. We sat in the specialist's office and I said, "Kirk wants you to tell him he can brace it and still play," knowing surgery was a given. The doctor grinned. He put Kirk through some range of motion and strength exercises and Kirk was mostly, oddly, pain-free. He put the scans and x-rays up on the light box and then showed us how the bones were in perfect alignment. He said he'd never seen anything like it before. Stood there grinning and shaking his head. What we think happened is that the bone pushed through the trap making a hole rather than tearing it away from the bone. The tension in the muscle over the last three days has pushed Kirk's collar bone back into place.

It's still slightly mobile and Kirk will continue to have therapy, but it appears to be structurally sound enough to play. Kirk has been cleared for THIS Friday night. He doesn't even have to sit out a week. It doesn't look like he will need surgery even later. Our jaws are still on the floor and we're trying to be as enthusiastic in our prayers of gratitude as we were with our pleadings. The doctor knows our team trainer really well and said if he didn't trust her the way he did and hadn't seen the x-rays himself from Friday night, he wouldn't have believed the injury had occurred the way it did. Wow. Just, wow.